- "When Jabba frowns... somebody dies."
- ―Doikk Na'ts
| We Don't Do Weddings: The Band's Tale | |
|---|---|
 | |
| Vital statistics | |
| Title | We Don't Do Weddings |
| Author | Kathy Tyers |
| Country | USA |
| Genre | Star Wars |
| Published in | Star Wars: Tales from the Mos Eisley Cantina |
| Publication date | August, 1995 |
| Characters | Figrin D'an and the Modal Nodes; Jabba the Hutt; Lady Valarian |
Synopsis[]
Told from the point of view of band member Doikk Na'ts.
Figrin D'an and the Modal Nodes are members of the Intergalactic Federation of Musicians (IFM) specializing in a style of music known as Jizz. While working on the planet Tatooine, they enter into an exclusive contract to work solely for the crime lord known as Jabba the Hutt. Figrin however, wants to get out of his contract.
One of Jabba's rivals, a Whiphid named Lady Valarian, sends an E522 assassin droid to Jabba's palace to recruit Figrin D'an's services. Valarian offers them 3,000 credits to perform at her wedding to the Whiphid hunter, D'Wopp. The allure of Valarian's Sabacc tables notwithstanding, Figrin feels that this would present an excellent opportunity to earn enough money to book passage off of Tatooine and get out from under the thumb of Jabba the Hutt.
The band sneaks off to Mos Eisley and sets their equipment up at the Star Chamber Café inside of Valarian's popular nightspot, the Lucky Despot Hotel & Casino. They begin playing at the wedding reception, but during the stage breaks, Figrin begins spending the band’s hard-earned credits at the Sabacc tables.
Jabba learns of this breach of contract and sends several of his henchmen down to the Lucky Despot to disrupt the festivities. This also allows Jabba the opportunity to sabotage his rival’s enterprises. As luck would have it, Imperial Stormtroopers likewise raid the casino. The band quickly gathers their equipment and scurries outside.
The Dorenian Beshniquel player known as Doikk Na'ts meets with one of the party guests, an untidy human named Wuher. Wuher invites the band to play at his establishment down the street – Chalmun's Cantina. The Modal Nodes accept the offer, but with the caveat that they will be leaving the desert planet at the first given opportunity.
Appearances[]
Characters
- Doikk Na'ts
- Figrin D'an
- Ickabel G'ont
- Nalan Cheel
- Tech Mo'r
- Tedn Dahai
Locations
- Jabba's Palace
- Mos Eisley
- Chalmun's Cantina
- Lucky Despot Hotel
- Ruillia's Insulated Rooms
- Star Chamber Café
Races/Creatures
Items
- Bandfill
- Dorenian Beshniquel
- Fanfar
- Fizz
- Kloo horn
- Lum
- MSE-6 mouse droid
- Ommni box
Notes & Trivia[]
- This story is the first vignette featured in Tales from the Mos Eisley Cantina.
- This story takes place the night before Luke Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi arrive at Chalmun's Cantina in Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope.