Deadpool (2016)

"You're probably thinking, "Whose balls did I have to fondle to get my very own movie"? I can't tell you his name, but it rhymes with "Polverine"."

- Deadpool

Deadpool is that little ole film that everyone is surprised was actually made. It is a comic book movie of the superhero action genre (though the main character will tell you, "I am no hero") and is based on the character of Wade Wilson, aka Deadpool, who is featured in a series of titles published by Marvel Comics. A version of the character originally appeared in the movie X-Men Origins: Wolverine, where he was portrayed by God's Perfect Idiot, Ryan Reynolds. But everyone pretty much agrees that the movie version of Wade Wilson sucked ass, and the groaning public dared Marvel Entertainment to do better. Despite the unforgiveable flub of how the character was handled in X-Men Origins, Marvel Entertainment decided to give Ryan Reynolds another go at it, and gave him his own movie. This time... they got it right. An overpaid tool named Tim Miller directed this cinematic jewel and it was produced by the asshats over at Twentieth Century Fox. Deadpool chimichangad its way into theaters on February 12th, 2016. In addition to Ryan Reynolds, the film also stars a hot chick named Morena Baccarin as Vanessa, who many may remember from the cult classic TV show Firefly, the flash-in-the-pan TV remake of V, and more recently, Gotham. Stefan Kapicic - an actor whom this database is convinced is completely computer generated took on the role of Colossus, a character who also appeared in other installments of the X-Men film franchise, notably X2: X-Men United and X-Men: Days of Future Past. Helping Colossus out in this film is a "moody teen" named Brianna Hildebrand who plays Negasonic Teenage Warhead. Yeah, Marvel really scraped the bowels of its own sphincter to come up with his obscure one-note comic character. Then there's Ed Skrein as Ajax - the British villain responsible for turning Wade Wilson's fine chiseled features into a butter face. T.J. Miller plays Wade's BFF Weasel and MMA champion Gina Carano plays the super-powered bad girl, Angel Dust. Topping it all off is actress/singer Leslie Uggams as Blind Al.